It is raining outside. and I am recalling the first ever downpour that I spent with you!It was my 6th birthday eve.I was longing for the moment when you would make me sit on your lap and fondly feed me Kheer (a sweet dish made of rice and milk) that you used to make for my birthday!.As soon as I got down from the bus, I used to sprint through the rice fields and on seeing you I hopped on to your cozy lap. Your neck and back used to be sweaty due to household chores, and so would be your saree.You kissed me all over my face and hugged me as tightly as you could! I still remember how I would cling to you with my arms flung around your neck and my neck encircling your waist. You then took me inside and helped me climb the bed. I remember the asbestos sloping roof through wich narrow bams of sunlight leached inside the room. The trees outside the window swayed with the soft breeze. I enjoyed the sight of people ploughing the fields or milking the cows, young children playing with ducklings and calves, some people sitting and smoking tobacco leaves while immersed in deep thoughts.
In the mean time you would get me lemonade and my favourite sweets. I ate them earnestly and you would satisfy yourself simply by looking at me. And then it was time to take bath. You hushed me up as I was so busy figuring out the new toys that grandpa had bought for me . You draped me up in a towel and took me to the pond at the backyard of the house. It was becoming dark. Dense black clouds were hovering above and I could hear the sounds of many birds that chirped from the surrounding trees. I was scared and asked you with a trembling voice.."why is it becoming dark dida(granny).."because it is going to rain dear". I walked up to the pond silently with her
By the time we were descending the muddy steps, it had already started drizzling.I felt the first drop of rain water on the back of my palm. That single drop of rainwater accelerated my joy a million fold. I looked up in eagerness and could vaguely make out the drifting clouds. Prior to this day I have never experienced such beauty of the nature. The coconut, date, banana, mango trees and their branches had now begun to sway more wildly. The rustling of the leaves created mysterious sound effects! Somewhere from the far I could here the call of a cow.. It appeared to me something like "hambaaa...hamba....". The ducks were frantically wading through the water. I broke in to hearty laughter at this wonderful sight and I was engrossing each of this wonders. The pond water splashed against the bank and there were ripples wherever tiny drops of rainwater fell
Dida meanwhile washed few utensils, and kept them aside. Next she opened her hair which were tied up in a bun . She oiled them and again tied them back!My heart leaped with joy when she asked me to come near her. She was already half immersed in water and slowly she waded through the water towards me. I stretched my arms and she grabbed them tightly, pulling me slowly and cautiously in the water. I could feel the mud underneath my feet and every now and then I was loosing my balance. I was holding my granny's hands with all my might. It had started raining quite heavily and in no time I was completely soaked. I sat on the banks with my legs happily swinging in the pond water that splashed all around! I could see tiny tadpoles and small fish in the water. I was having hell of a rocking time! I wanted to show them to my grandmother but as I looked up she had already swam half way through. I jumped on my feet and started shouting and clapping my hands. My eyes rolled in excitement as I watched Dida swiftly taking leaps in the water. suddenly I saw her taking a deep breath and dived under the water. I panicked! Where did she disappear? Barely 10 seconds have passed before she reemerged from the water right next to me. Those 10 seconds had scared the hell out of me. I was in frantic tears and felt so helpless. On seeing me Dida embraced and hugged me tightly as I was sobbing uncontrollably! She tried consoling me but I would not budge. " How dare you could leave me and disappear all of a sudden?" Dida was also in tears. She kissed my forehead and promised me that she would be always by ny side. I still remember her penetrating eyes full of tears. I was at peace when my head rested on her bosom and she picked me up draped in her own saree and brought me inside the house.
But then on this thought or you could say this apprehension has not left me completely and I don't remember how many times I have made her swear not to leave me. But we all are puppets at the hand of time and destiny. I grew up in a metropolitan city where the hustle and bustle of the city engrossed me completely. The physical distance was huge between me and Dida that even if we wanted to we could not meet at our will!
She passed away a week ago.. I have not yet been able to digest it. I could not take that my Dida betrayed me! After all she had promised me so many times that she would never leave me. Today I am sitting besides the same pond, my heart aching with agony! My whole body has gone numb and I feel as if I am having a free fall from a great height! Everything that I see around has your signature in some or the other way!..the stairs to the pond, the cattle shed, the kitchen, the bed, the temple and so on!. The iron chest where you kept your sarees still has your odor locked inside. When I close my eyes I can feel your presence very immensely just beside me. I am holding the saree that she was wearing on that day. I draped it around my self and stood transfixed on the muddy stairs, soaked from head to toe, unable to remove my gaze from the pond...........
No comments:
Post a Comment