A prayer

dear lord..



i would like to thank you for the life you gave

yet

I beckon you to give me wisdom, that brighten up others like the candle of the church

Ego that melts like the snow of the harsh winter,

a heart full of love, that can drench people like the falling snowflakes,

determination as strong as the reigns of santa's carriage,

May I be able to stand tall and resist all bitterness like the x-mas tree,

May I have an aura as glowing as the christmas star...

May I be as soothing as the christmas carol,

I plead you to make me wiser and brave

I desire you to remain close to me till my grave

Dui prithibi.....

Tumi ar ami sompurno alada jogoter manush. Tomar jokhon din, amar tokhon adhar raat, abar amra jokhon diner tanaporen e byasto takhon tomar jogot shanto, ghumonto. Amader du joner majhkhane byapto hoe roecho koto pahar, porbot, nodi, morubhumi, desh, mahadesh, sagor, mahasagor ityadi. chaand takeo mone hoe se jano tomar cheye onek kache. Ei durotto ta i bodh hoe pradhan karon je haath bariye chuina tomae, mon bariye chui. Tai to tumi etoi apon, etoi nijer.

Aj o mone pore, jedin tumi gele chole, stationer lounger bhara jana - somudror majhkhane, sei thomke jaoa muhurto tar kotha. Oi asombhob bheerer modhye buk phata kanna, ar cholke jaoa chokher jol chepe rekhe, sudhu ei tukui e bolte perechilam "sabdhane jeo". Ar thik tar porer muhurto theke suru holo tomar poth chaoa ar kaal gona, ja ajo thameni...

Jak, se sob kotha,,!! Kamon acho tumi? Kamon lagche notun jaega, notun poribesh, notun kaaj, notun bari, ar notun kacher manush? Ekta aloukik shanti jage mon e je koto sundor kore, sob kichu sajiye guchiye niyecho nijer moto kore. Eto dure thekeo, jokhon tomar unnotir khobor sudur bidesh theke bhese ashe, anonde, khushite, mon bihubol hoe othe. Tomar shafollo aj surjo shikhar chuyeche, sei roshnai amar ghorer mejher opor eseo thikroe.

Tumi amar astitwa heen, adhaar jibon alokito korechile ek nabodito aruner moto. Sei ujjol alor resh ajo amar jibon bhoriye rekheche. Tumi aro unnoti koro, sustho thako, anonde thako, ishwarer kache ei prarthonai kori. Tumi amae ja diecho tar rin ami hoeto kokhonoi sodh korte parbona. Je karoner jonno aj amader majhkhane ei antaheen durotto, hoeto ami seta kichuta bujhi, ar tai amar kono abhijog nei, nalish nei, akankha nei.

Prothome khub swarthopporer moto mone hoe chilo je amar ar kichui roilona, kintu nijer bhetorta toliye dekhini, je sob sukhosmriti diye gecho, se gulo amar ekanto apon, amar jiboner amulyo dhon. Ei dhon ami sara jibon agle rakhbo. Ami bachbo tomar ashae, tomar bhalobashaye.

for u who reached out for my hand, but touched my heart instead, .................

i seek happiness in melancholy songs,
merry songs just have a passing touch...
this will never belittle me,
as i will always have eternal happiness amidst searing pain...
thats survival, thats moving on and thats true virtue....
It has not got to do with any living soul
nor it has to achieve any goal,
its just an endeavour to unravel inner peace, wisdom and sanctity....
i think not of any appreciation,
far from ornamented praises,
if my thoughts ever touched you,
my gift wud be that pearl drop from the corner of your eyes..
may be in the darkness of blemished reality,
i might not be able to convey you the piousness of my soul,
but,
the fragrance of my being would always embrace you...

farewell

one day when at leisure,

spring wind in your hair,
a sigh rising from distant nights of the past
the tears of the fallen lily fracturing the sky
look for me then,
something that remains half unforgotten -
trace me in your tears at a corner of your soul.
Perhaps it will illuminate,
perhaps it will give joy,
perhaps it will seem like a nameless dream.
But no, dream this is not for it is the truest of all my truths this,
that i leave for you is my love,
this is my immutable offering deathless, changeless.
I leave this behind,
while life carries me on along the
streams of change wheeling with the flow of time.
O friend, farewell....o friend farewell.....

Rhythm of life

Today is a special day. 14 years ago, on this very day I had joined my dance class, as reluctant as ever could be. Actually it had been my mother who made me victim to her desires. Its not that I complain any more, rather I am very grateful to her, that her decision maneuvered its way through my silly tantrums. It was raining cats and dogs outside, one of those rainy days, which most delhites dread. I had traveled all the way from Faridabad which was a good 56 kms from the dance institute in that weather. I stood mawkishly outside the classroom, chanting curses to my mom under my breath. I could see no highway option against my mother's determination to make me learn this particular classical art form. So loathing her as much as possible, I entered the classroom, clutching her saree. There sat a lady on a low height couch, wearing a maroon saree, black rimmed spectacles, a round maroon kum kum, adorned her forehead, and above all what drew my attention the most, was that million dollar smile. I never realised when my grip had loosened and I had let go of my mom's saree, and was slowly ushered towards her. With utmost care and warmth she asked me whether I had any dancing experience or not, and made me do couple of steps to see whether I am capable of adopting this style! Here I would like to mention one thing, as far as I have known her, she has never returned a student, but has always tried to bring out the best in each candidate! I was taken in by her and I formally became the disciple of a living legend, an extraordinary danseuse, a person who epitomizes perfection, dignity, aesthetics,creativity, devotion, love, and serenity! I would not deny that even after couple of weeks, I still did not like myself being dragged from school, fed in the local trains, knee breaking one hour dance practice, a horrendous journey back home, and to top it all, never ending saga of homeworks, assignments, worksheets, and exams! I cannot pinpoint what exactly made me fall in love with this art form, but my teacher surely had been a pied piper. Exams and other academic stresses persisted for another decade but unceasing dedication to dance and my teacher always kept me rejuvenated and kept the fire burning! The very presence of my Guru in the class, acted as an antidote to any kind of mundane feelings. It was the best thing that had happened to me and probably the best thing that I will relish till my last day! I feel blessed and privileged to have someone like her to show me the righteous path. 14 years of teenage and adolescence, under her guidance flowered into a beautiful youth, which enables me to see the most unnoticed and delicate nuances of life. Apart from dance what I learn from my Guru is to be humane, way of conduct, and other little things which strengthens the persona so much so that I have paved my identity amongst many commoners. My teacher always emphasizes on the concept of centrality, and orderliness. Through dance, we realize that how important a center of space is. Similarly each individual should have a focus or a center point to concentrate on. Balancing the center at the right place is what will make you successful in the end. otherwise an individual with a dislocated center, will be nothing more than a stool with a broken leg, which neither stands nor falls!

alight inthe dark!!!

In the darkness of this desolate room,,if thou may come empty handed,,that does not fear me, as I know I have both your hands to hold onto. Time has passed negotiating, gains and losses, now it is time to offer myself to you..Let the darkness be everywhere, except for my heart which is filled with the glow of your passing touch..The cradle of life rocked me, and I was far from myself, and now life and death contemplates me in a tug of war...yet it does not fear me as I know I have both your hands to hold onto....

The mark of God

One fine night, whilst deep in slumber,
A falling star ensued from the window ajar.
The flickering whick that had lit the room,
had been blown away, instead
A soothing light was in bloom
I saw myself in this divine night
Holding in my arms a treasure petite,
A subtle face, skin as soft as the daisies,
the rosy lips, the scented breath, as tthat of fairies!
I lost my senses to this miraculous charm,
A part of me embraced inmy cozy arm
I woke up startled amidst of the dream
Alas! All I could afford was a silent scream.
My lap was dark and the ol lamp still,
The darkness profounded, tempted to kill.
With a flick of a sword and slash of a knife
The savage customs took away the innocent life!
The agony beseeched into a stifling pain
Oh! How I wish that the star would fall again!
I know not whether to see it as a curse or a reward
I choose to be a woman blessed with the mark of GOD!!!